From the Archive: "I had to swipe right" - from Bumble Chats to Chanting Wedding Vows
How One Swipe Changed Everything for Peter & Jessica Umeh
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Hello, please introduce yourselves and tell us what you do.
Peter: My name is Peter Umeh, and I am a UI/UX designer.
Jessica: My name is Jessica Umeh, and I am an information security specialist.
Nice to meet you both. Let’s get to the real deal. Where and how did you two meet?
Peter: We met on Bumble, a dating app. We both swiped right and started talking.
What made you swipe right? And what was your first impression when you saw each other’s picture?
Peter: She had and still has the most beautiful smile on planet earth. Her pose, her colored hair. So I told her I was really eager she swiped right too.
Jessica: I saw a very fine boy. I was new to the app. I joined a day before I saw him and swiped right. When I saw his pictures, he was just too cute. I had to swipe right.
So, when did you start dating? Who made the first move?
Jessica: October 10th, 2022. I sent him a message first because that is how the app (Bumble) works. Then he gave me his number, and we moved to WhatsApp.
It’s Bumble, it can be a one-time thing or not. So when and how did you decide to make it a long and forever thing?
Peter: She posted a picture on WhatsApp status, and I replied. I sent a voice note singing Ric Hassani’s “Beautiful to Me.”
Jessica: We didn’t chat on Bumble after the day we met. He gave me his number, and we moved to WhatsApp.
Peter: We started talking consistently, and I first visited her in July. We got married on August 1st this year in court, had a traditional wedding on August 5th, and a white wedding on August 12th. Just last month.
Wow, this all happened within a year! May God bless your marriage. I wish I had known you earlier; I would have come for free food.
Jessica: Amen. Thank you.
When was the first time you guys met physically?
Peter: July 22nd, 2022.
Jessica: I didn’t feel the same way I felt for the past month we had been chatting and doing video calls online. I felt I didn’t like him as much on the first day.
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What made you change your mind?
Jessica: It was a lot of things: seeing him more often, learning to spend time with him, praying and getting clarity from God about him, communicating and telling him how I felt at every point, and being open.
Aww, this is lovely. Peter, you mentioned your heart wasn’t ready for a relationship. Why was that?
Peter: I got out of a relationship a few months before and also got scammed by a tech company that promised a lot and disappeared.
Ouch, I’m sorry to hear that. You guys have pretty interesting stories to tell. So, moving on to the next stage, who is the better cook?
Peter: It’s hard to decide.
Jessica: I haven’t eaten his food before, except simple things like fried egg and fried plantain. So it is hard to decide.
Okay, who is more romantic?
Jessica: My husband is… chuckling
Lol, so we should leave it for him?
Jessica: Yes, please.
What are your favorite activities that you enjoy together?
Peter: Watching Christian movies (especially Mount Zion movies), listening to sermons, studying our Bible, reading books together (we read a couple of books on Christian dating and marriage before we got married), and doing a 30-minute workout in the morning.
Jessica: Bible study is a big one for us. We study and talk about it and dissect it, and it often leads to a full study session. I also love it when we watch Mount Zion movies together. I actually introduced him to the world of Mount Zion movies, and right now, we’re even watching “Abattoir.” We also enjoy working out together, especially when we play tennis.
What are some of the most memorable moments you have shared together?
Peter: Meeting and hanging out at IITA, as well as the entire dating experience.
Jessica: Flying together to Abuja for our traditional wedding. I don’t like flying, and just him being there and holding my hand and encouraging me meant a lot to me.
During our honeymoon and the wedding reception, we had a session for couples to dance with us, and it was so beautiful. All the couples formed a circle around us. We stood in the middle, and all sang to our partners.
Awww, I wish you more memorable memories. Have you ever worked on a project together? How was it? What was the experience?
Peter: Our wedding is one, and we have a game project we kept on the shelf for a better time.
Jessica: Yessss! There was so much planning that went into all 3 weddings.
Three weddings? Really? Tell me more, please!
Jessica: Court wedding, traditional wedding, and white wedding.
Who proposed marriage, and was the proposal a surprise?
Jessica: Him!!!!
Peter, tell me about the planning, please?
Peter: She didn’t know I would be in Lagos and was planning a surprise. I got an Airbnb and decorated with her friends while they brought her in later.
Awww, so sweet. About the project, what is this game project about? How was the experience working together?
Peter: She called Ibadan to Lagos long distance. So we were playing online games a lot and doing video calls. We wanted to create games for “long-distance” people can play— a card game for now. The experience was good. She’s too detailed. She came with Excel spreadsheets, scheduling a specific time to talk about the project, and I came with Adobe Illustrator and Figma, putting together mood boards of ideas together.
Ha, but isn’t Ibadan to Lagos distance long?
Peter: Some people are doing Nigeria to Afghanistan.
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Well, well. So, how do you balance work - life - relationships?
Jessica: Our activities are timed, which helps.
Peter: We have schedules for everything, and she made that possible. Working out, Bible study, and movie time. She made Google Meet for everything before marriage, and we have alarms so we don’t miss it.
A consistent queen. So, can you tell me three things that you like or love about your partner?
Jessica:
- His heart. He is such a kind, sweet, and intentional person.
- His brain and how his mind works. He is VERY intelligent, very knowledgeable about current affairs, and he knows a lot about almost everything. He is the king of life hacks. I go to him for life hacks a lot.
- His eyes. I love his eyes so much. They are so sincere.
Peter: Her energy. She’s detailed, caring about me, her friends and family, and her smile.
Love it for you :) Now, I have questions for you. What is your partner’s favorite food?
Jessica: Amala and Ewedu.
That is my favourite too, but with Gbegiri.
Peter: Yes, with that too. But she likes Ofada rice and stew.
Peter, what is her favorite skincare product?
Peter: She does not care much about skincare products.
Jessica, what is his favorite color?
Jessica: He doesn’t have one in particular, but he generally likes dark colors.
There’s this insider rumor in the tech space that techie people are promiscuous and that we don’t do commitment. What do you guys think about it?
Peter: Generalizations about a group of people are not always true and have nothing to do with techies. One time, we heard it’s bankers, doctors, nurses. Anyone can be disciplined.
Jessica: I do not think promiscuity is tied to a particular job type but rather to an individual. People who lack self-discipline will be promiscuous, people who are not content with their partners will be promiscuous, and people who do not value their partners or who do not understand love or marriage will be promiscuous. Lack of understanding also plays a role in promiscuity.
Have you ever woken up in the morning and watched your partner beauty sleep? What usually comes to your mind?
Peter: I just kiss her cheek and jump on her when she wakes up and tell her how beautiful she is.
Jessica: Yes, I wake up at random times at night a lot, and I just spend time staring at him and watching him sleep. I remind myself how blessed I am to be with someone so intentional, amazing, and caring. Most times, I place my hand on him and pray for him till I fall asleep.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your partner?
Peter: 10/10. She’s amazing and a blessing.
Jessica: 10/10, to be honest, he is sent from God.
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I love, love, love stories like these. Beautiful in all sense.